Tuesday, October 26, 2010

COLBY CRUSH: ALEXANDER OVECHKIN




I wish I could tell you that I know something about hockey. Despite my Communist sympathies, I don't agree with the politics of team sports (subverting the individual will for the benefit of the group). I think it has something also to do with an aversion to violence maybe?  Or a history of being forced to listen to football games as a kid and getting headaches.  Plus, football is soooo obnoxious and boring!  They play for 2 seconds and then break for 5 minutes!  WTF.  Get off the couch and ride a bike America.

After visiting the Korean bathhouse this weekend, I think I could definitely "get into" hockey or at least "get into" one famous Russian hockey player and his buns of steel. 






I only wish I could show you pics of what I saw at the Korean Bathhouse. . . Ovechkin is HUGE, all muscle with a gorgeous Ba-donk-A-DUNK (and BIG floppy uncut cock to boot).  I watched him for a bit laying on a pool chair, mafia entourage in tow, diddling his big low-hangers as he casually chatted with his buds, flipping his semi back and forth with one hand, gesticulating casually with the other.  Ovechkin is actually quite handsome . . . in an Addams Family kind of way.  I was lucky enough to catch a grin.  He boasts a missing front tooth that he lost in a match against the Atlanta Thrashers.  He refuses to get it fixed, claiming that "the girls find it sexy".  He's wrong.  Some boys find it sexy too.  ;-)

10 comments:

  1. Damn colby! That "something" some people got,

    he got it !

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  2. Oh I know what he got. . . and its nice. :-)

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  3. Ovie? Really? I don't know... for some reason, he looks like he would have BO and halitosis.

    And now I can't stop thinking about his big floppy uncut cock. Well, I suppose if you make him shower, give him a breath mint, and put a paper bag over his head...

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  4. You really ran into him at a bath house?

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  5. Colby, you'll recall what I said on your Ukrainian post about the banya (public bath) in Slavic culture:

    "I've spent a lot of time in the former Soviet Union, not a small amount of it in the banya checking out other men. The banya traditionally occupies the same sort of cultural space that Monday Night football does in the US, but there men hang out naked, beat each other with birch leaves, and scrub each others backs while shooting the breeze, smoking, snacking, and drinking. Obviously, same sex nudity and homosocial spaces are much more normative than in American culture. I much prefer their traditions to ours!"

    In other words, it is completely normal for Russian men to behave the way Ovechkin did-- AND sexy as hell. If only our American culture wasn't so hung up on nudity and homophobia....

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  6. Which Korean bathhouse were you at?!? Spa World in Centerville VA usually has some hot Russians hanging out...

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  7. Yes, Spa World in Centerville. So much fun!

    To Rich F. . . Ovechkin is actually quite handsome in person. He has a couple of bad tattoos which sucks, but the rest of him was HOT.

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  8. He didn't lose his tooth against the Atlanta Thrashers.... he lost his tooth playing basketball.... Try using Google. And Ovechkin is disgusting....

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  9. Actually, Anonymous, Colby DID his research and he did lose his tooth in a game against the Thrashers. I would know, I watched the game. And Ovechkin is hot, quit being a hater.

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  10. I saw him at Spa World too. He is HUGE and quite hot!

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