Wednesday, October 5, 2011
C_ _ _ DUMP
What starts with C? And end with Dump? No! You're so dirty. Not that.
Yesterday, I made a run to the Baltimore City Municipal Dump to chunk off the remnants of my bathroom demolition project. What should I find in the public dumpster? A perfect mid-century modern Danish couch! Without breaking a leg there was no way I could rescue it. Overcome with sadness, I peeled back onto Quarantine Road, only to find a teenage boy propping himself against the landfill entrance sign.
Head turned down, headphones on, ostensibly listening to music, he had both hands in his over-sized pants vigorously masturbating. Only in Balmer. . . Or in Portugal. Oddly reminiscent of the film "O Fantasma", which I profiled last October for Flick U, perhaps the boy was simply a cinephile and not merely a trash-pile-phile. The film tells the story of a deranged teenage boy who rapes his neighbor, a studly soccer player, then escapes to the city landfill for a debauched orgy of nasty, nasty alone time.
When I need alone time, I like a nice warm bath and some lube. Different strokes for different folks.