Friday, April 6, 2012


How would you celebrate the death of a man?

By dying eggs of course!  In Spanish "huevos", along with the more familiar "cajones", is slang for testicles.  Testicles are probably not what most have in mind come Easter time but they're as good a metaphor as any.  Both eggs and testicles do give us babies after all.

This Easter, BSD Minister of Propaganda Karl Marxxx and I decided to die our eggs the old fashion way, using Dad's silk ties (or in our case, an adequate thrift store substitute).  If that special man in your life left you behind with nothing more than a bureau full of vintage neck-ware and a heart full of memories, this may be the perfect send off.  Life, as Jesus himself will no doubt testify, is a lot like an egg.  It's a very fragile thing indeed.

To start the process, I attempted to learn how to knot a tie.  While most 31 year old males should know how to do this, it's not exactly a commonly prescribed skill on the porn set.  This is the best I could do unassisted, on my own:

While praying for divine intervention might help some, looking in the mirror may have served me better than staring at the ceiling fan.


Next, gather a dozen fresh eggs.  We attempted an experiment with two brown eggs, and the results proved disappointing.  While I'm down with brown and black is most assuredly beautiful, white works best.  (I swear I'm not a racist!)

Make sure the tie you decide to use is 100% silk.  After you're 100% certain, cut it into strips.  Place the front, died surface of the fabric onto the egg.  Wrap it with string until you're satisfied it's secure.  Dental floss works fine.  The more you wrap the better.  The string helps adhere the surface of the tie to the egg.

Then wrap the eggs in white cotton fabric.  We used the lining of the tie and an old t-shirt.  Securely wrap them again with string.

Place the eggs into a large pot.  Cover with water.

Add three table spoons of vinegar.

While we waited, we died a few eggs the traditional way. . .

Boil the eggs for 20 minutes, remove from the heat, let cool, then unwrap.

Surprise!  Even the label took.

The end results. . .


  1. AND you can do crafts?! You're perfect!

  2. Cute as always... and those eggs are awesome!! i'll try someday somewhere... by the way, I don't know if it was some kind of joke but I am spanish and we don't say "cajones" (that would be drawers ), we say "cojones". :)

  3. I never heard of that method before, and the eggs look great! In your next video, maybe you can have some big hot man stand behind you and show you how to knot a knecktie!!!

  4. Those are wild. Definitely gonna have to try those.

  5. that is so cool, totally going to try this!

  6. No organic dye? Colby, Martha Stewart would be horrified. And she would definitely tied up an assistant while crafting.

    1. How much more organic can it get than vinegar and re-purposed, 100% silk ties, I ask you?

  7. Colby you and Mr Marxx are sooooo Martha....the eggs look fabulous and fun and so much more entertaining than the traditional ones.....and learn to tie a tie for fuck's sake!

  8. Eggs is slang for testicles (balls/bollocks) in Russian too-- jajtso/yaytso s. jajtsa/yaytsa pl.

  9. I would've loved to see the video of this being made! :)

  10. Marry me!!!!!!!

  11. Bet I can get a pair of Colby's eggs in my mouth. Hell, I've had plenty of practice!

  12. Colby i love you, from the bottom of my heart, i swear it!

  13. please pleaseee, tell me something, tell me thats not gonna be posible, tell me im wrong, tell me something