Tuesday, April 3, 2012
I SMELL SEMEN: APRIL SHOWER
It's that time of year again. . . It's getting warmer; flowers are blooming and the smell of semen lingers in the air. No, its not the semi-annual Keller family picnic/orgy (that's in August). It's Spring! If you live on the East Coast, you know what I mean. The Bradford pear or Pyrus calleryana 'Chanticleer' smells like vomit to some and spunk to others. I personally prefer the latter.
Spring IS all about sex after all. There may be no more adamant a reminder than the dense odor of a fecund evening. While its no surprise I'm a fan, I'm not the only one. In 2005, the Bradford pear won best urban tree in an annual survey of City Trees magazine readers (and no, I'm not making that magazine up either. It exists). The Bradford pear brings fresh new resounance to April's unofficial anthem: "Rain, rain, go away. CUM again, another day." Indeed.