Monday, March 31, 2014

EVERYTHING BUT LENIN


Good morning Baltimore . . . and goodbye!

My slumlord Simone finally put the screws to me.  Sadly, this will be my last year in Charm City.  My loss, however, is your gain.  The opportunity of a lifetime (mine) has finally arrived!  I am giving away everything (and I mean EVERYTHING!) I own.  Come to Lovegrove Alley and get a 'piece of me' (for free) for yourself. . . everything except Lenin that is.  He's mine.  

Seriously.

Book a van and buy some boxes.  It's yours.  Just let me know when you're coming: lovegrovetreasuretrove@gmail.com.

Whatever you don't take, goes back to the thrift store from whence it came.   For those so inclined, I'll also gladly accept donations.  I'd like to buy a decent van and tour the country for a spell where-before I settle. . . Albuquerque perhaps?

















32 comments:

  1. Wow! Big news. New Mexico would be an excellent choice. Plus, the people are rising up!
    http://huff.to/1hqbAO8
    Good luck Colby!

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  2. What a GREAT place.... too bad you have to move! Come to NYC!

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  3. I'm sure you'll find a home wherever you go, someone as open-hearted as you will always attract love and comradeship.

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  4. Can I buy the knobs of the stove? I have the same stove and mine are missing.

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  5. Love the lamps on either side of your pillows. I've been looking for something similar. When I find them they are expensive. They are something you should consider keeping or contact me and we may be able to arrange something. I'm on twitter @JLarryHanna.

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  6. In case you've missed it everywhere else: This would be an awesome time to hole up somewhere and write a book of your own. With, say, a couple of hilarious authors ...

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  7. I looked up this Simone Campbell Scott. She's a Jungian analyst and social worker. Bitch. She should do a little self examination. Anyway, awesome opportunities await darling Colby.

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  8. Would have loved to get some of your stuff! Not only because you owned it but because you've got some great stuff!! Unfortunately I dont see myself doing a 9 hour drive... :(

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  9. Glad you're seeing this as an opportunity to travel and see new places! If you should happen to roam near the Va Beach / Norfolk area, you're welcome to crash here any time.. or with a little notice, I'd be happy to take a day off work and play tour guide. :)

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  10. As a former Baltimorean, this saddens me. I have always enjoyed thinking of you in my native city. For me, you are a part of the town, like the Bromo-Seltzer clock or Zelda Fitzgerald's breakdown. Love wherever you land.

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  11. What about all your lovely books?! Artwork?! New Mexico is nice; I'd love to live there myself. =)

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  12. Will this be the end of updates on Big Shoe Diaries? :(

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  13. good fortune to your future endeavors Colby. keep the faith.

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  14. Remember that vagabonds can park free overnight in Walmart parking lots, and that a $20 Planet Fitness membership buys you a hot shower in any of hundreds of locations conveniently located near highways and byways nationwide.

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  15. Lenin is pretty damned awesome, but I can see why you wish to keep him. We shall discuss this further in two weeks, hmm?

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  16. Oh wow, the old ritual cleansing! Now you can be Foster Huntington 2.0. Baltimore's loss is the a City to be Named Later's gain. Loving the Titanic model myself.

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  17. ma mère est un avocat, elle pourrait vous aider, en plus de quelque chose que l'avis juste ne semble pas juste. s'il vous plaît ne pas appeler ce numéro, 410-940-3029. Erica Blanc peut vous aider.

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  18. bonne chance pour trouver un nouvel endroit, je suis désolé que vous deviez vous débarrasser de toutes vos belles œuvres d'art, je ne pense pas que je pourrais jamais partie de mon histoire, fesses c'est juste moi, vous avez fait le meilleur choix pour vous possible. Il est encore un choc pour moi que votre crosse de star du porno hey ​​nous avons tous besoin de l'argent à droite.

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    Replies
    1. Google Translate makes this amusing.

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  19. I'm sorry you have to move, but I'm wicked excited for you. Especially since you seem to have a decent plan and a very positive outlook the situation.
    I'm such a big fan of yours it's too bad I'm in FL, or I'd come help and even hold your "things" until you got settled in.
    I can't wait to read all about your adventures while you tour. You're so effervescent I'm sure you'll meet plenty of amazing people during your travel.
    If you decide to swing by the sunshine state, I'm sure there will be a warm reception for you. TRUE story
    Good luck Bro.

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  20. you make thiftshop chic look good. too bad you have to give up the funky address. however, home is where ever you hang your hat or hats.......get a map, throw a dart and head THAT way......

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  21. What a shame that you will loose your lovely place. Don't get rid of everything, store things you like, otherwise you might regret it and spent a fortune to buy back things you love and lost. But moving around is a nice idea and if you ever have the urge to come to Europe, come and drop by at our place in Hamburg, Germany! Good luck to you and I hope to hear/read/see from you again soon. Big hug!!!

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  22. I am skeptical--you have way too many cool things. And what about all those books that make your johnson tingIS THAT A SNAKE BITING JEAN-LUC PICARD IN THE FACE???

    I want that.

    Make it so.

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  23. Vegas Baby! We'll welcum you with open arms! I'd love to bring my moving van just to collect up your art work...

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  24. Colby, best of luck to you, and enjoy the 'walkabout' before you settle somewhere.
    But for the love of God, take down the image of the letter with the address! Protect your privacy, sir - there's nothing that can't be found online!

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  25. If you settle in ABQ...I'll move back since it's (mostly) from whence I came.

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  26. Fuck that cunt, Simone. She just wants to triple the rent. My slumlord did the same thing to me in the 90s, after an entire winter with barely any heat. I loved that no a/c havin' shit-hole.

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  27. is it too late to get a box? I'm in Baltimore.

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